When it comes to online dating, there are six types of losers to watch out for (and nine ways to spot them).
Without a doubt, internet dating is here to stay, for better or worse. If you’ve been around these sites for a time, you’ll be familiar with these six categories of jerks to avoid, as you’ve undoubtedly encountered many, if not all, of them yourself. It’s not a good idea to get cynical and believe that all men are bad. To avoid having your heart torn out or your financial account depleted, all you have to do is throw away your rose-colored glasses.
If you’ve just created a profile on one of the dating sites for the first time, or for the first time in a long time, you’ll be surprised at how many men express immediate interest in you; unfortunately, a large percentage of these men will be predators, pretenders, and parasites, and they all know that the new girl on the block is easy prey.
Surprisingly, only one-out-of-five committed partnerships began through online dating, according to Statistic Brain. These odds appear to be quite low to me, indicating that many users on these sites are searching for a hook-up, a diversion, or a sucker to rip off rather than a committed relationship. So don’t go into internet dating assuming that everyone is yearning for real love just like you.
Six Types of Louses and Lowlifes to Watch Out For:
- The Catfisher — For his own self-serving purposes, he wants to pull the wool over your eyes and entice you into a relationship.
- The Scam Artist — He’s looking for your wallet.
- The Knight in Shining Armor — He wants you to think he’s the solution to your prayers, only to discover later that he’s your greatest nightmare come true.
- The Married Man — He wants to have his cake and eat it as well.
- The Player — He’d like to add another notch to his belt.
- The Commitment-phobe — He doesn’t know what he wants from you.
Okay, you might be wondering, now that the manipulators and phonies have labels, what’s a female to do? For starters, there’s no need to become paranoid and abandon the online dating environment. All you have to do now is be aware of the red flags that will appear along the route.
Here are nine easy red signs to keep an eye out for. If you spend enough time on dating sites, I’m sure you’ll come up with your own ninety-nine red flags.
Nine Online Dating Red Flags
1. He tells you everything you want to hear.
He says things like, “I’m looking for a long-term relationship;” “I’m seeking for a long-term partnership;” and “I’m looking for a long “I’ve never felt such a strong bond before;” “This was fated in the stars;” blah, blah, blah.
On this one, go with your instincts. If he appears to be your Knight in Shining Armor, poised to sweep you off your feet, meet him sooner rather than later to get a reality check. A guy with all the appropriate lines could just be a plain old Player telling you whatever you want to hear in order to get in your trousers and flee.
2. He only wants to text and not talk.
It’s more likely that he’s married or in a relationship and unable to communicate, or that he’s a Player texting multiple women at the same time. When no one is looking, these guys can only text. Consider this scenario: they can simply hop out of bed with one woman, dash to the bathroom, and send a quick text to another unwitting woman.
3. He lives across the country, but acts like he didn’t know that you lived so far away.
Long-distance dancing is popular among commitment phobics since it provides an excuse for not seeing each other too much and allows them to regulate how close you get or don’t get. Long-distance dating is also used by catfishers, players, and scam artists since it allows them to control you and a large number of other women at the same time.
4. He’s been on the site for years.
Either there’s something seriously wrong with him, or he just wants to play and not remain. This personality type is frequently a Player or a hard-core Commitment-phobe.
5. He tells you he isn’t looking for anything serious, and you lie to yourself about how you’re cool with this.
You tell yourself that he’ll alter his mind once he gets to know you and realizes what a terrific catch you are. Give up the erroneous belief that you can modify or fix someone. Commitment avoiding has become a full-time hobby for this guy.
6. He’s been talking to you for months, but keeps avoiding meeting you.
He’s most likely a professional Catfisher who will never meet you since he isn’t who he claims to be or what he claims to be. He could potentially be a sex addict who is having phone sex with you.
7. He talks sex talk with you and you haven’t even met him.
8. He’s really great looking, meets you, but is going away any day on business.
He emails you from a different place a week later, saying he’s in a problem and only needs a little money to return home to you. This Scam Artist tactic comes in a variety of forms.
9. He can only meet you during the week.
He’s most likely in a relationship or married.
Learning to follow your gut and not giving everyone the benefit of the doubt is the greatest way to defend yourself from the new breed of internet monster men. It’s up to you to remove the blinders and enter the digital dating world knowing that many of the men on these sites aren’t who they claim they are or who they appear to be.